


Words

by zenlikestowrite



Category: Day6 (Band)
Genre: Kinda Fluffy, M/M, Quick oneshot, highschoolers, i still dont know how to tag on this site LOL
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-11
Updated: 2018-12-11
Packaged: 2019-09-16 10:04:34
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,229
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16951944
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zenlikestowrite/pseuds/zenlikestowrite
Summary: in which Brian and Jae have a falling out and neither of them know how to express themselves through actions, so they use the best thing they can - words.ORIGINALLY WRITTEN & POSTED ON JUNE 13, 2016. (check on asianfanfics.com if you want lol)Please keep that in mind as you read because I wrote this before the Every Day6 project so no I didn't steal "You Were Beautiful" :')





	Words

**Author's Note:**

> twitter: @zenkrcovers | kakao: zenaya  
> feel free to message me on either, I'd love to make MyDay friends! :D

_"Did they actually?!"_

_"Oh my God, I thought they were going to freakin' marry each other!"_

_"Who do you think broke up with who?"_

Jaehyung tried ignoring the whispers as he walked into school, keeping his eyes straight forward and pretending not to notice the curious stares he got from the people who were gossiping to each other. 

He quickly made his way to his first period class, grateful that _he_ wasn't in it. 

_God, you may as well talk louder, I can hear all of you perfectly well._

Jae thought to himself as he sat down in his seat, and waited for the school day to start. The whispering and murmurs just seemed to get louder as Jae tried to drown them out, so he reached in his bag and pulled out his earphones and hurriedly put them in his ears and plugged them in his phone.

_Really? This song?_

Jae quickly switches the song, refusing to listen even a second longer, because all it does is remind Jae of him. 

Jae sits in his first period class, praying that time goes slower. He even asks more questions even if he completely understands this Math Lesson, but he just doesn't want to go to second. Once the bell rings, Jaehyung decides to stay back for a little longer and ask the teacher for clarification. 

The tall blonde boy feels like slamming his head into a desk as he listens to his teacher calmly explain the simplest concept Jae has ever been taught. 

"Jaehyung, are you okay?" 

Jae looks up at his teacher, slightly confused and wondering if even the teacher had found out about his break-up.

"Yes, I'm fine."

"It's just unusual seeing the top of the class not understand such a simple lesson.." the teacher explains,

"Ah, yeah..." Jae says awkwardly, "Well, now I understand it." Jae lies and takes his textbook off of his teacher's desk,

"Thanks sir!" Jae yells out as he leaves the classroom.

The boy purposely walks excruciatingly slow, upsetting whoever was stuck behind him. 

_Maybe I should skip..._ Jae thinks to himself, but then decides against it because he knows Language Arts is his personal favourite subject.

Jae is standing outside of the room of his second period class, sincerely debating whether or not he wants to be in there. But the bell rings, and he walks in anyway, avoiding the sets of eyes on him, and pretending not to notice how the whispers died as soon as he walked in.

Something he can't avoid though, is _his_ eyes. Following Jae's tall figure as he makes his way to his seat, which is right beside his. Jae's suddenly grateful that the desks in this class are separated, because he wasn't sure if he was ready to be that close to him yet.

The teacher says her greeting, and then proceeds to do attendance. Jae's mind is wandering until it draws closer to his name, 

"Brian?" the teacher says,

"Here." his familiar voice says, calmly and Jae ignores the sight of Brian staring at him from the corner of his eyes.

Rollcall ends and Jae really wishes he wasn't in this class right now, because he can feel everyone's eyes on him and Brian, and he can faintly distinguish the words of curiosity being whispered amongst the class. 

"Okay, class, today I will be assigning a new project that will be due at the end of the week, this Friday." 

Jae's grateful that the teacher is finally talking because hopefully this will distract him. And the mention of a new assignment allows him to have a point of focus, other than the silver haired boy to his right that just can't seem to take his eyes off of Jae.

"Your assignment is to create a piece of writing, it can be anything. A poem, a short story, lyrics, anything." she announces and soon continues,

"It can be typed up, or hand written. This is a very free assignment." 

The students are nodding, but Jae is focused on what he wants to write about,

"The reason for that being, the pieces of writing will be anonymous. And they will remain anonymous when we present them to the class, after drawing a piece of writing out of a box on Friday."

The teacher then goes on to further clarify that it must be on paper, for the sake of it being put into the box, and answers any questions the other students have.

The rest of the class is given to the students to brainstorm or start writing their piece. After staring a blank piece of lined paper for almost 15 minutes, Jaehyung finally grabbed his pencil and started to scribble something down. He listened to music, drowning out the gossip and questions, and simply began writing, not caring about a certain boy named Brian who broke his heart over the long weekend. 

At the end of class, Jae quickly gathered his things, wanting to avoid the possibility of Brian stopping him to talk or anything that involved even being near him.

"Wait, Jae!" 

He failed.

Jae turned when he felt a familiar hand on his wrist, preventing him from going any further or quicker,

"What?" he tries to act cold but he hates the way his voice sounds small in front of him. Brian stares into his eyes a little longer before saying,

"Can I talk to you for a second?" 

Jae doesn't want to hear anything so he tries walking away but Brian's gentle yet firm grip on his wrist prevents it,

"Jae," Brian says again and Jae can almost crumble at the way his name sounds coming from his mouth,

" _Please_." he practically begs.

Brian seems to disregard the girls at the side who are whispering about what's going on. Jae stares at Brian before saying,

"I don't think there's anything more I want to hear, Brian." and he doesn't miss the way Brian's eyes sadden, but also tinge with regret,

"Unless you're planning to break up with me a second time." Jae says coldly, and the girls' gasps are clear and loud in his ears.

Brian bites his lower lip, and lets go of Jae's wrist. 

And then Jae's off, practically bee-lining to his lunch break. 

Part of him is happy that, that interaction only lasted a few words. But most of Jae wished Brian had held on. Had tried to get Jae to listen, even for just a minute; Jae wished Brian hadn't let him go.

 

* * *

 

The week consists of Jae ignoring Brian's every attempt to try and talk to him. And him surprisingly being enveloped by their Language Arts assignment. 

The reason Jae loved this subject was because he isn't the best with actions, so he likes being able to express himself with words. He liked the endless possibilities of different universes and lives that could be made up of a combination of 26 letters. So he let himself be absorbed in the assignment, to produce a piece of writing he was satisfied with. 

But one of the main reasons Language Arts was his favourite class and subject, was because of Brian.

The same Brian who had broken his heart over the 3-day weekend, was the reason he loved Language Arts. Brian, himself, wasn't good with actions so Jae liked that aspect they had in common. He liked having his boyfriend in a class, even sitting beside him. But now, the things that once made him happy, are only painful and distracting, and Jae wishes he could hate Brian, but he can't.

And so, with this kind of heart, he produced a piece of writing, leaving it hand-written because he liked the authentic and organic feel it had, rather than having it formally typed up. 

When Friday came along, Jae didn't even bother avoiding second period, because, frankly, he was quite excited to listen to the pieces of writing his class has prepared.

More specifically, he was curious as to what his ex-boyfriend had written.

The tall blonde boy walks into the Language Arts class, greeting his teacher with a smile, and sitting at his seat. Brian doesn't try and get his attention this time, but is instead reading his own piece of writing, and Jae can tell how concentrated he is. 

The bell rings, and the teacher begins by saying,

"Okay, class. Today, we're reading the pieces of writing, written by you guys." she then proceeds to take out a box, and place it on her desk,

"Please hand in your pieces, and we will begin the random draw, and reading." 

The classroom is filled with chairs scraping the floor as students get up to hand in their assignments, and Jae tried not to react when his hand brushes Brian's when placing his piece of writing in the box.

"Okay, we'll be going in alpha-order, although it doesn't really matter considering the piece will remain anonymous. You are to read the piece, and then express your thoughts on it. Remember. these are written by your classmates so, be honest, but also stay kind with your words." the teacher instructs, and the readings begin.

Jae's barely paying attention, because he's just wondering when his is going to come up, and maybe if he can recognize Brian's style of writing. 

"Brian" the teacher calls, and Jae is suddenly focused.

Brian sighs as he gets out of his seat, and walks up to the box. Jae tries reading his expression when he picks a piece of paper, and walks up to the front of the class, but it's unreadable. But Jae thinks he sees Brian almost smile, before saying,

"Uhm, this piece is called 'It Was Beautiful'." and Jae's eyes go wide.

_No freakin' way... Someone else must have the same title. There's no way._

Jae thinks, but is proven wrong when Brian proceeds to clear his throat, straighten his posture and recites;

_"It Was Beautiful._

_With truth and sincerity, I can honestly tell you that I was happy. In those moments I felt pure serenity, I wasn't concerned about the trivial worries of the everyday world. Instead, I was indulged in the delightful thought of his existence._

_His presence in my life, in this vast world where billions of people reside, our lives managed to collide. Just the thought of him caused my lips to curve into a smile. A smile that was only possible because of him. The way his arms wrapped around my waist and gave me a sense of protection, a sense of belonging. The way his arms would pull me in close and his sweet voice that would whisper sweet nothings into my ear..._

_I was truly happy._

_Because of him._

_Because of the glances he stole at me when I was focused on something other than him. The irritated feeling I would have after work, being completely dispelled as he stood in front of me with an umbrella, waiting for me to take shelter. Because of his beautiful smile that never failed to make me smile, or his eyes that stared into mie with such certainty and the purest love I have ever seen._

_Because of the warmth our bodies shared, intertwined after watching some Disney moves, my head on his chest as it rose and fell at a steady pace, and I was taken over by slumber. And it was also due to the sweet kisses that varied in length, but never changed in the amount of love conveyed. The proud voice he used when introducing me to his friends, his parents. It was because he loved me, for me. Including all my imperfections and insecurities, he loved and accepted those until I learned to do the same._

_So I was sincerely happy._

_The nights we spent stargazing, connecting the stars to form ridiculous pictures with corresponding stories to them, I still smile at them. My lips still curl in bliss whenever I reminisce about that time we were on a food run at midnight, which resulted in an immature food fight, and kisses that tasted like pizza. That one day at the beach, where as the setting sun painted the skies beautiful hues of orange, pink and purple, we just sat in the back of his pick-up trick, talking about everything and nothing..._

_So even when things started to change, I was sincerely happy during these times, the times with him._

_Even though the words of farewell escaped the lips that used to say "I love you", the lips that used to shower me with kisses,_ his _lips. Even if "movie nights" turned into me, alone in my room, hugging the teddy bear he gave me on our anniversary. Even though someone else is now receiving his love, I can honestly tell you I was happy._

_Some people say that 'he was just a stupid boy', and that 'he probably never really loved me in the first place.'_

_Call me optimistic, but I refuse to believe that._

_I refuse to believe all the words, the moments shared with him, weren't sincere._

_I refuse to disregard the things that made me happy in the moment._

_So, if you ask me how our relationship was, despite the breakup..._

_Well, I can honestly tell you,_

_It was beautiful."_

 

The whole class is quiet as Brian finishes Jae's piece of writing, and Jae doesn't even bother to clap, because he's too busy staring into Brian's eyes. The way Brian is sadly smiling, and looking at Jae tells the tall boy that he knows it's his. The class erupts in applause and Jae ignores the girls exaggerating and saying they almost cried, because they don't know the amount of emotion he put into that piece.

"Uh," Brian starts off and Jae is reminded that he now has to share his thoughts on the piece. 

"I think this piece of writing is honestly beautiful." Brian says, not breaking the eye-contact with Jae,

"I could really feel the raw emotion that the author put into this. I think the author of this piece is really mature, and is a very amazing person. Not everyone can get out of a relationship and see it as something beautiful, and- and it's human nature to hate someone that has caused you pain... But, the author of this piece seems to cherish the happy memories they have created together, and I think it takes someone really, _really_ ," Brian stresses and he looks at Jae with sorry eyes,

"special to look at a broken relationship like this." 

The class claps again as Brian sits down in his seat.

A couple of more readings go by, but Jae's too distracted by the whole idea of Brian, of all people, being the one to read his writing. Jae's disarray of thoughts are interrupted by a,

"Jae, you're up." from his teacher.

He gets up, absentmindedly and picks a piece of paper from the box, and walks up to the front. He looks down at the paper, and can't help the amused smile that makes its way to his face,

_What are the odds..._

"This person entitled their piece, 'Apologies.'" Jae says, and he doesn't even need to guess. The handwriting is enough for him to look at Brian with certainty. The class is quiet, as Jae starts to read

_"Apologies._

_'I'm sorry.'_

_2 simple words that are incredibly hard to say. 7 letters that are supposed to convey all the guilt you've been feeling._

_The hours I've spent pacing in my room, muttering words to myself, planning how I was supposed to say sorry, to apologize to him. The nights that I've gone through without a wink of sleep because my mind won't allow it. The guilt of hurting someone like him wouldn't allow me to rest._

_And I didn't want to rest._

_I didn't want to be able to sleep without a problem, I didn't want to sleep soundly while I knew he was probably wide awake._

_Because then that would mean I didn't care._

_Not being bothered would mean that none of my feelings were sincere, it would mean that I wasn't being haunted by the ghost of his fingers tracing patterns on his skin, or the words that still lingered in my head._

_And so, being kept awake resulted in me, alone with my thoughts in the pitch black of my room, having a lot of time to think._

_To think about what I would say once I mustered up the courage to actually apologize. To actually say something to him after not talking for days. Once I was able to look him in the eyes without breaking down, because I honestly have no right to do so. All of this time that we spent separated only made me remember our times together._

_So, with these memories flowing through my mind, I managed to formulate a slightly coherent apology for when he has the time to listen. It's ready for whenever he wants to heard it, and maybe in the future, hear it again. It's ready for when he can look me in the eye and not start to tear up, or when we can talk face to face and maybe I can explain myself._

_Apologies are extremely difficult, and it's not because of my pride or ego. It's simply because I know I've hurt him. I know that, and although he may not believe me, saying sorry is a must._

_So, when the time is right and he's willing to listen, I am prepared to say 'I'm sorry.'_

_I'm sorry for letting him down._

_I'm sorry for stealing kisses and his food. For making him breathless when I held him too tightly. For the memories we created that hurt him as much as they hurt me._

_I want to apologize for ruining love for him._

_For shattering his beautiful idea of what our love was for him, and also for the nights his parents ambushed him with concerned questions of when he was coming home, only to be answered by tomorrow morning because I refused to let go of him for the night. I'm apologizing for wasting his time, when phone calls went on for hours and sometimes we didn't even talk, the line was just silent because just hearing his breathing was enough to make me smile. For making his cheeks hurt and eyes water when I made him laugh too hard, and also for the lies he had to make up to explain for the hues of purple and maroon that marked his neck when my lips wouldn't let his skin go._

_I'm sorry for not listening to him when he told me to stay in bed while I was sick, because I didn't want to cancel our dates, or I just wanted to see him._

_I'm apologizing for lying to him._

_I'm sorry for lying and telling him I didn't love him anymore, because that's not true, for saying there was someone else, because there isn't._

_Sorry for the unnecessary heartache I've caused both of us because I stupidly thought maybe he'd be happier, but I couldn't be more wrong._

_For taking so long to say all of this because I honestly didn't know how, I regret all the times I almost caled you, but didn't because you probably didn't want to hear anything from someone as dense as me._

_I'm saying sorry for letting go of the only person I've ever loved, making him cry even though I vowed to beat up anyone who did so._

_Lastly, I would like to apologize for one more thing._

_I'm sorry for having the audacity, for being so full of myself and selfish enough to put him through the pain of asking for a second chance."_

 

Jae finishes reading Brian's piece of writing, and is staring at him as tears line his eyes and his hand holding the paper starts shaking. Jae waits for the applause to die down before bluntly saying,

"I think the person that wrote this is an idiot." 

"Jaehyung-" the teacher says, but Jae cuts in,

"It's okay, Miss. I know who wrote this, and I know for a fact they want to hear the truth from me." he says as he looks at the teacher, reassuringly and almost as if he's asking permission to continue.

"This piece of writing, although beautiful, is... frustrating." Jae says, staring at Brian,

"They broke up with someone because they thought they would be happier? What about the happiness they caused them.. What about the pain the person who wrote this felt, after letting go of someone they loved? I just wished that- that  this person wasn't apologizing for breaking up with someone, but rather apologizing for maybe the hardships they may face in the future, for loving that person so much that he doesn't want to let go."

he continues, and Brian bites his tongue in order to not start explaining himself in front of the whole class.

Jae sits back down, avoiding the way Brian looks at him, and at this point, just wants to curl up in a corner. The boy doesn't even listen to the rest of the pieces, as his mind is just filled with questions, and the most predominant being, why? 

As soon as the bell rings signalling lunch, Jae shoots up from his chair and grabs Brian's wrist, and the 2 are off. They pass girls whispering in shock and anticipation, but Jae just needs to get them somewhere quiet where they can talk. 

"Jae, wait" Brian says as he looks behind them and sees that they both left their things,

"We can get them later, this can't wait." Jae says and Brian can't help a little smile that forms on his lips as he looks at Jae's hand around his wrist.

The two are now outside, at the back of their school, and as soon as they're facing each other Jae says,

"Why did you do it?" 

"Because I thought you would be happier with me not by your side-"

"How could you even think that?" Jae said,

"When we were together, what did I do or say that even implied anything else or anyone else would make me happier... You made me so freakin' happy, Brian, and I thought you knew." 

"Jae-"

"And what about you! You look like you haven't slept in days, and- and you never smile anymore so why, Brian? Why would you cause us both this heartache?"

"Because you're too good for me, Jae. You're top of the class, your potential is limitless and I felt like I was crippling that. You've always said the sky is the beginning, but I feel like with me, that's your limit." 

"Crippling my potential, my ass." Jae said, laughing at how pathetic this whole situation was, but his tears were threatening to fall,

"Brian, I fucking love you. Don't say you're not good enough for me, because you're so perfect, it's surreal. Honour roll and top of the class don't even compare to the satisfaction I got simply holding your hand..." 

Silence took over the broken couple, as Brian stared at the ground while Jae's gaze still lingered at the boy in front of him, who he still loves.

"Please say something." Jae said and Brian looked up, "anything."

"I still love you." Brian blurts out,

"That's all that comes to my mind because it's honestly the only thing I've been feeling ever since I broke up with you. The amount of regret that's been eating at me is crazy, but I know I can't complain because you've been hurting too. And _God_ , I'm usually good with words but right now, standing infront of you those are only ones that come to mind, and honestly, I think it's all I can say." 

"And what do we do if I still love you, too?" Jae asks, not really knowing how Brian would respond.

"This"

Brian says and Jae doesn't have time to process what he means before he feels Brian's familiar lips locked on his.

Brian's hand finds its way in Jae's hair, and the other is at his waist, pulling him closer. Jae didn't realize how much he missed this; how much he missed Brian. The kiss is sweet, and not too long, just long enough that their feelings of longing and regret are conveyed.

"Well, that was unexpected" Jae says against Brian's lips when they pull away.

"Sorry," Brian says, smiling as he feels Jae's arms snake around his neck, and he continues,

"I'm normally really good with words, and horrible with actions, but I couldn't think of anything to say."

The two just stare at each other,

"God, I can't believe you broke up with me.." Jae says, 

"Hey, I did it with the best intention, I was thinking of your happiness." Brian argues,

"Then you'd be thinking about yourself, so _no_ , you weren't thinking about my happiness" and Brian chuckles before saying,

"But did you like my piece of writing? It was dedicated to you,"

"Yeah, I know. You didn't properly erase my name on the side of your page," Jae says, laughing 

"Okay but, you have to admit, it was pretty cute."

"Just stop with all the words and kiss me." the taller says and is smiling when Brian doesn't hesitate to say just 1 more word,

"Gladly." 

 

**Author's Note:**

> once again, just wanna say I originally wrote this in my phone notes on May 6 2016 (conspiracy theory) and posted it on Asianfanfics on June 13 so the similarity between "Jae's piece" It Was Beautiful and You Were Beautiful was completely coincidental ;-;   
> please comment any thoughts, I'd love to know! thank you for reading. <3


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